[Salika]

Originally Posted by Jaysh

Look at any MSA for the proof.

Ok saying salams doesn't lead to fitna. The fitna in the MSA's is a result of more than just salams.

Look if people have bad intentions, then it doesn't matter what they do or don't do. You can go the masjid with the intention to flirt or meet someone to do drugs. You can sign up for a class because there's a girl you think is cute in there. You can sit in a seemingly harmless gathering because you want to gossip. Yes anything that leads to haram can be haram too, but it's not a be all end all rule.

[Jaysh]

Originally Posted by IbnMardhiyah

I totally disagree.

There are plenty of hot Muslim chicks that I've said salams to without any such thoughts as you're implying. You just say salaams sincerely and genuinely do not show any passing interest in her. Look at the bridge of her nose or her forehead for a second when saying salams, and then go back to whatever the heck you were doing as if she's just some insignificant lowly serf.

That pretty much kills it right there.

What happens after that, [if it does] is a different story.

You're an amazing guy then, masha-Allah.

But do you think everyone is like you?

Out of 10 guys, how many do you think are like that? Honestly?

[sumiyia]

wow, jaysh... managing to say that i have a kaffir mentality AND that i'm sinful all within a span of 3 minutes is probably a new record for you. go you!

if you can't manage to see my point then oh well. my opinion is what it is. whether you choose to understand it or dismiss it entirely as you did is your prerogative. have a nice day.

[Jaysh]

Originally Posted by sumiyia

wow, jaysh... managing to say that i have a kaffir mentality AND that i'm sinful all within a span of 3 minutes is probably a new record for you. go you!

I don't know you, so I cannot say whether you have kaafir mentality or if you are sinful or not.

Rather, all I said was that *this* is kaafir mentality. There is a difference.

What I am criticizing of yours is NOT whether or not you think it is ok for young men and young women to say salams to each other. What I *am* criticizing is you viciously insulting and demeaning and degrading those who take the stricter opinion on the matter, people who are probably much more religious and careful in controlling their nufs than you and I are. Do you think it is appropriate for you to say to these people "what? You can't control your hormones for even a split second?" Which implies that they are hormone driven people, whereas they are the most cautious and careful of people!

I say salams, but I certainly would not question the 'hormone level' of the one who refuses to say salams to girls. Rather, I would say 'wow, he is a very pious and careful man.'

[sumiyia]

Originally Posted by Jaysh

I don't know you, so I cannot say whether you have kaafir mentality or if you are sinful or not.

Rather, all I said was that *this* is kaafir mentality. There is a difference.

What I am criticizing of yours is NOT whether or not you think it is ok for young men and young women to say salams to each other. What I *am* criticizing is you viciously insulting and demeaning and degrading those who take the stricter opinion on the matter, people who are probably much more religious and careful in controlling their nufs than you and I are. Do you think it is appropriate for you to say to these people "what? You can't control your hormones for even a split second?" Which implies that they are hormone driven people, whereas they are the most cautious of people!

yea okay... i don't have time to humor you.

[Jaysh]

Originally Posted by sumiyia

yea okay... i don't have time to humor you.

Gotta go somewhere?

[infamousbrown]

I didn't say salams to the hijabis at school because they'd all fall in love with me and you know, I wasn't going for that then.

[sumiyia]

Originally Posted by Jaysh

Gotta go somewhere?

gotta study. and also run around the block salaaming everyone i see (read: spread fitnah)

[Jaysh]

Originally Posted by sumiyia

gotta study. and also run around the block salaaming everyone i see (read: spread fitnah)

OK, good luck. Salams.

[PhDGirl]

Originally Posted by Jaysh

OK, good luck. Salams.

Astafirallah! Next thing you know, Sumi will be going to MSA meetings at her law school! Tauba, tauba!

[IbnMardhiyah]

Originally Posted by Jaysh

You're an amazing guy then, masha-Allah.

But do you think everyone is like you?

Out of 10 guys, how many do you think are like that? Honestly?

Maybe you should come to Toronto sometime - plenty of guys like me here. If you want an honest no BS answer, that out of ALL guys that I know personally, who say salaams to the opposite gender, I'd say a good half 5/10 say salaams quite normally to unrelated Muslim women without hitting on them in any way.

And I also kindly disagree with your example of the Barseesa story. That's not the case here. The guy violated a specific trust given to him by her brothers. He took advantage of her being alone in the house. That's very different from me passing a Muslim woman at work or in public and just giving her the greeting of peace out of standard courtesy.

[Jaysh]

Originally Posted by IbnMardhiyah

Maybe you should come to Toronto sometime - plenty of guys like me here. If you want an honest no BS answer, that out of ALL guys that I know personally, who say salaams to the opposite gender, I'd say a good half 5/10 say salaams quite normally to unrelated Muslim women without hitting on them in any way.

So you are admitting that HALF of all men cannot give salams to a hot girl without thinking things. Why then, good sir, are you criticizing the need to discourage the salams then?

And I also kindly disagree with your example of the Barseesa story. That's not the case here. The guy violated a specific trust given to him by her brothers. He took advantage of her being alone in the house. That's very different from me passing a Muslim woman at work or in public and just giving her the greeting of peace out of standard courtesy.

I really think you missed the entire point of the Barseesa story. The moral of the story was that all things start out small. In that case, it started out as something very small. In that story, it started out with a greeting, I do believe.

[spicyhijabi]

Originally Posted by Jaysh

So you are admitting that HALF of all men cannot give salams to a hot girl without thinking things. Why then, good sir, are you criticizing the need to discourage the salams then?

I really think you missed the entire point of the Barseesa story. The moral of the story was that all things start out small. In that case, it started out as something very small. In that story, it started out with a greeting, I do believe.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

[spicyhijabi]

I greet everyone I see.
Whether they be men, women, children, Muslim, non Muslim, animals
The greeting people thing is due to working in retail.
They make you greet everyone within a certain amount of feet of you.
The greeting animal thing is because I'm an oddball

[Jaysh]

Originally Posted by spicyhijabi

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Word.

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