Saying Salam to the Opposite Gender

[jinnzaman]

If I saw Eva Mendes, I'd give one of the most long, drawn out and flirtatious salams in the history of mankind.

[wheelworks]

Originally Posted by jinnzaman

If I saw Eva Mendes, I'd give one of the most long, drawn out and flirtatious salams in the history of mankind.

Who's Eva mendez?

[jinnzaman]

Originally Posted by wheelworks

Who's Eva mendez?

An angel that walks the earth.

[wheelworks]

Originally Posted by jinnzaman

An angel that walks the earth.

Angels are male if you haven't figured that out already

[thejellymill]

oh common jinnzaman, at least mention someone that's not so fakey. I strongly dislike it when black and latina/hispanic women dye their hair blonde...they look so much more beautiful with their natural hair .

Anyway. It doesn't matter who's objectifying who....the real question is, (like sumiyia said) why do we have to reduce everything to men/women/sex/fitnah? Why are Muslim men so afraid of Muslim women? We don't bite...just say salaam dammit, the non-retarded ones among us will not think you want to marry us (just like the non-retarded brothers don't lust after every hijabi they see). If they do, then so be it and let them live in their own little stupid world.

[m_ali_qazi]

Originally Posted by thejellymill

Anyway. It doesn't matter who's objectifying who....the real question is, (like sumiyia said) why do we have to reduce everything to men/women/sex/fitnah?

we dont have to do it, our environment does that for us already

the movies, the music, school environment, social environment, adverstising.........and the MSAs and other muslim youth groups, they all revolve around the same theme

[sumiyia]

Originally Posted by m_ali_qazi

we dont have to do it, our environment does that for us already

the movies, the music, school environment, social environment, adverstising.........and the MSAs and other muslim youth groups, they all revolve around the same theme

and that's what bothers me. i know its out there. just wish it wasn't. wishful thinking i guess. we'll talk more on msn.

[amina9183]

i return the salams i get from brothers...but I say salam first sometimes--like if its my friends husbands or my friends husbands friends...then i say salam to them, just out of respect for my friends husband.

i think its odd to randomly walk up to someone of the opposite gender and say salam..its like a non-muslim girl/guy that goes and say "hey!" to everyone they see.

and i dont remember who said it, but if someone stands and talks to your husband and doesnt even acknowledge you, but then 2 seconds later goes and chats it up with non-muslim women, that just means he has more respect for you. if theres a REALLY valuable decoration piece, ppl are very careful with it..they dont even touch it. but if something is from the dollar store, theyll toss it around and be rough with it and dont really care. The fact that he ignored you just means he thinks you are the valuable decoration piece, and those women are dollar-store material I love it when muslim brothers avoid me like the plague It shows respect.

[sumiyia]

Originally Posted by amina9183

i return the salams i get from brothers...but I say salam first sometimes--like if its my friends husbands or my friends husbands friends...then i say salam to them, just out of respect for my friends husband.

i think its odd to randomly walk up to someone of the opposite gender and say salam..its like a non-muslim girl/guy that goes and say "hey!" to everyone they see.

and i dont remember who said it, but if someone stands and talks to your husband and doesnt even acknowledge you, but then 2 seconds later goes and chats it up with non-muslim women, that just means he has more respect for you. if theres a REALLY valuable decoration piece, ppl are very careful with it..they dont even touch it. but if something is from the dollar store, theyll toss it around and be rough with it and dont really care. The fact that he ignored you just means he thinks you are the valuable decoration piece, and those women are dollar-store material I love it when muslim brothers avoid me like the plague It shows respect.

with all due respect, that makes NO sense to me at all.. probably the worst logic i've ever heard. and i completely and totally disagree to the fullest extent possible.

[m_ali_qazi]

Originally Posted by sumiyia

with all due respect, that makes NO sense to me at all.. probably the worst logic i've ever heard. and i completely and totally disagree to the fullest extent possible.

it depends on where a person is coming from

in a lot of societies, the higher the status of women the more inaccessible they were

think of the women of royal families that would travel in completely covered and concealed carts and carriages

[Timbit]

Thinking somebody is a "valuable decoration piece" is objectifying them just as much as thinking they're "dollar-store" material.

[jinnzaman]

Originally Posted by Timbit

Thinking somebody is a "valuable decoration piece" is objectifying them just as much as thinking they're "dollar-store" material.

It was an analogy to allude to the notion that Muslimahs are precious diamonds.

(Rep meeeeee. :drool: )

[sumiyia]

Originally Posted by Timbit

Thinking somebody is a "valuable decoration piece" is objectifying them just as much as thinking they're "dollar-store" material.

i agree. ignoring someone is just rude. i find someone to be respectful if they address you properly instead of ignoring you.

[jinnzaman]

Originally Posted by sumiyia

i agree. ignoring someone is just rude. i find someone to be respectful if they address you properly instead of ignoring you.

Rudeness is a subjective cultural construct. Stop being Eurocentric.

Gender relations are defined by the Shari'ah, not by how rich white people behave.

[sumiyia]

Originally Posted by jinnzaman

Rudeness is a subjective cultural construct. Stop being Eurocentric.

Gender relations are defined by the Shari'ah, not by how rich white people behave.

aside from the social context, i don't see it working it all in the professional context. it would be very very hard to get things done if every third person just up and ignored me out of "respect." and from the discussion in this thread, i think there's a difference of opinion as far as the shari'ah goes as well. i don't think there's a clear cut ruling on completely ignoring a woman.