[Timbit]

So if Allah says marry one or two or three or four, if you'll be able to do justice, but that you'll never be able to do justice... then why do we interpret that to mean polygny is allowed?

Doesn't that actually mean that it's not? Because you'll never be able to be truly just between your wives?

[nectar]

Originally Posted by Timbit

So if Allah says marry one or two or three or four, if you'll be able to do justice, but that you'll never be able to do justice... then why do we interpret that to mean polygny is allowed?

???

This is the translation i got:

004.003YUSUFALI: If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice.
PICKTHAL: And if ye fear that ye will not deal fairly by the orphans, marry of the women, who seem good to you, two or three or four; and if ye fear that ye cannot do justice (to so many) then one (only) or (the captives) that your right hands possess. Thus it is more likely that ye will not do injustice.

[zzze]

asslama alaykum

There are a couple of verses on justice with regards to women, nectar. Can't be bothered finding them as this has been discussed overrrr and overrrrrrrrrrrr.

[Anderson]

Originally Posted by Timbit

So if Allah says marry one or two or three or four, if you'll be able to do justice, but that you'll never be able to do justice... then why do we interpret that to mean polygny is allowed?

Doesn't that actually mean that it's not? Because you'll never be able to be truly just between your wives?

The trick is to get your wife under wraps in the first few weeks, give her a slap or two and make her feel like you've done a big favour for marrying her that's when you get wife number two.

I hope that helps bro

[Ugur]

The Prophet (peace be on him) and a number of great companions (may Allah be pleased with them) are reported to have more than one wife. Didn't they understand the Qur'an as well as you understand? The last time I read more about the above-mentioned Quranic verse in a tafsir, I remember it as saying it can be more virtuous to have more than one wife.

[Ugur]

Besides, I think the Quran may be saying you can't do "full" justice, but if you should marry more than one wife, try to do your best. Get very close to the full justice that is necessary though you can't perfectly attain it.

[zzze]

asslamau alaykum

Those fearful and loving of their Lord wouldn't take on MORE responsibility lol.

[Pushpa]

Originally Posted by zzze

asslamau alaykum

Those fearful and loving of their Lord wouldn't take on MORE responsibility lol.

If it was 7th century Arabia and it was a choice between being fearful and loving of your Lord by marrying only one, and being fearful and loving of your Lord by doing your social and charitable duty and marrying some poor widow with X number of kids - which would you do?

And Timbit - why did you open up this can of worms AGAIN??

[zzze]

asslamau alaykum

We're not in 7th Century Arabia.

[Pushpa]

Originally Posted by zzze

asslamau alaykum

We're not in 7th Century Arabia.

Oh, we're discussing it purely in relation to today's world. OK.

[zzze]

asslamau alaykum

oo ok. I was refering to today's world, I don't know if Timbit was

[ChotooMotoo]

Polygyny in a modern context could only be practiced on a very limited scale, and only for very limited reasons. A man would have to have a very good reason in todays world to do it, say if the first wife couldn't have children, became ill, the second wife is very poor and needs support, or is divorced and can't re-marry for some reason. It is possible even in modern times to make it work, but it would be very difficult and would require cooperation from all parties. An ordinary Joe in the modern world cannot marry a second wife for lust, when there is nothing wrong with his first marriage, and think that everything will turn out well. Undoubtedly in a modern context, and second marriage will leave the first wife feeling depressed and thinking "what was wrong with me that he went and married another." THat can lead to all kinds of problems and regrets.

[Pushpa]

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

Polygyny in a modern context could only be practiced on a very limited scale, and only for very limited reasons. A man would have to have a very good reason in todays world to do it, say if the first wife couldn't have children, became ill, the second wife is very poor and needs support, or is divorced and can't re-marry for some reason. It is possible even in modern times to make it work, but it would be very difficult and would require cooperation from all parties. An ordinary Joe in the modern world cannot marry a second wife for lust, when there is nothing wrong with his first marriage, and think that everything will turn out well. Undoubtedly in a modern context, and second marriage will leave the first wife feeling depressed and thinking "what was wrong with me that he went and married another." THat can lead to all kinds of problems and regrets.

I think those feelings existed even in the Prophet's time. And even the scenarios you mentioned Chotoo, have limitations; I don;'t think an ordinary Joe in today's modern world would have an easy time of it if he decided to marry again, even if it was because his wife couldn't conceive, especially as there are so many options available to childless couples these days. Personally I don't think there IS a place for polygyny in a modern context.

[Yahya]

assalamualaikum

I disagree with those who say you cant be just to your wives, you may not be able to stop feelings between them, senses of jelousy or even them feeling that you arent just. How ever i would like to point out that that also happens in nearly all couples, one might feel that the other isnt giving them enough atention, isnt spending enough time with them etc.

In reality what AllahSwt is asking for is what he seeks from all married couples, that they respect the rights of each other, in a polygymous marriage this would go on to include that the husband treat his wives equally, itself compassing the reuqirements that he spend an equal amount of time on them, spends an equal amount of resources, ensures that one doesnt feel less loved than the other.

I think the real issue is that all partners know and respect the rights of each other, whether a polygymous marriage or not. Its hard yes, but not impossible and there will be times where they slip up in BOTH polygymous and non-polygymous marriages.

wassalamualaikum warahmatullah
Yahya

[zzze]

asslamau alaykum

how old are you and how many wives do you have?