[Timbit]

I honestly don't understand what you guys are talking about. Who cares if she converts before the marriage or after the marriage and who cares about the assumptions? Just stop assuming things.

And why is it such a bad thing for Muslim men to marry Christian women, Chotoo?
It's allowed and if they want to, then they want to. Who cares? If you're not in the relationship, it's not your problem.

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by Timbit

I honestly don't understand what you guys are talking about. Who cares if she converts before the marriage or after the marriage and who cares about the assumptions? Just stop assuming things.

And why is it such a bad thing for Muslim men to marry Christian women, Chotoo?
It's allowed and if they want to, then they want to. Who cares? If you're not in the relationship, it's not your problem.

The assumptions can make it difficult for people to integrate into the Muslim community.

Why are interfaith marriages a bad thing? What about your children? What about the stress of being married to someone who doesn't share your beliefs in a very important area of your life? Maybe I'm very pessemistic, but to me the initial love and infatuation you feel for someone can't grow into a very strong relationship if you don't share certain things, and to me one of those things is religion. If you're not strong in your faith to begin with, being in such a relationship could ultimately cause you to lose it altogether. I just don't think it's worth it to lose your faith, to lose jannah, just for a woman/man. There are other problems associated with marriage, why add religious difference to the mix.

There are people who make it work, good for them. I just don't think it's a good idea.

[Timbit]

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

The assumptions can make it difficult for people to integrate into the Muslim community.

Why are interfaith marriages a bad thing? What about your children? What about the stress of being married to someone who doesn't share your beliefs in a very important area of your life? Maybe I'm very pessemistic, but to me the initial love and infatuation you feel for someone can't grow into a very strong relationship if you don't share certain things, and to me one of those things is religion. If you're not strong in your faith to begin with, being in such a relationship could ultimately cause you to lose it altogether. I just don't think it's worth it to lose your faith, to lose jannah, just for a woman/man. There are other problems associated with marriage, why add religious difference to the mix.

There are people who make it work, good for them. I just don't think it's a good idea.

Okay, well... you're not in an interfaith marriage so you don't have to worry about it.
And if the Muslim community is so non-accepting anyway, then why would you wanna be integrated into it?

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by Timbit

And if the Muslim community is so non-accepting anyway, then why would you wanna be integrated into it?

There are many people who don't want to be integrated into it, isn't that sad? Even the case mentioned in the biased article... if the woman had been part of the greater Muslim community, had really made a lot of friends, would she have felt a hole in her life and gone back to being Christian?

I don't know. Lots of things to think about.

[sixpakistan]

I agree, it's generally not a good idea. In the time of the Prophet (SAW) when interfaith marriages happened, the guy was generally calling the shots.

That isn't the case so much anymore in most modern Muslim marriages, especially in the West - where interfaith marriages are more likely to occur. You'd need some kind of solid guarantee that she isn't going to mess with the raising of the kids in terms of religion.

Also, another important distinction is that when these marriages were occurring amongst Muslims, they were occurring in Muslim areas within Muslim communities where everyone the kids would interact with was a Muslim. They were within an entirely Muslim environment. That's not the case in the West, and the implications of this are obvious.

Then, of course, there are other issues that need to be addressed before marriage (no pork in the house, throw away the miniskirts, no cross hanging anywhere, forget about wine with dinner, etc).

But ultimately, if a guy wants to do it, a guy wants to do it.. as long as all the conditions are fulfilled, it's his right.

And having said all that, I don't think it's an epidemic or a serious problem for us by any means. It's an added problem for Christians because their "flock" is already dwindling rapidly through low birthrates and apostasy/conversion.

[Timbit]

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

There are many people who don't want to be integrated into it, isn't that sad? Even the case mentioned in the biased article... if the woman had been part of the greater Muslim community, had really made a lot of friends, would she have felt a hole in her life and gone back to being Christian?

I don't know. Lots of things to think about.

It's not sad if the community is making assumptions and being judgmental.

I dunno many interfaith marriages where the Muslim man has been so religious in the first place though. But if they can make it work, then that's great for them.

[Anderson]

I think i'm in platonic man love with sixpakistan.

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by Timbit

It's not sad if the community is making assumptions and being judgmental.

I meant that it's sad that people don't want to be in the community BECAUSE people are judgemental and make assumptions, meaning that Muslims shouldn't do that kind of stuff.

Anderson - I think you need to spend more time in the 3-word story threat venting your frustrations.

[Anderson]

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

I meant that it's sad that people don't want to be in the community BECAUSE people are judgemental and make assumptions, meaning that Muslims shouldn't do that kind of stuff.

Anderson - I think you need to spend more time in the 3-word story threat venting your frustrations.

You should spend more time shutting the **** up.

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by Anderson

You should spend more time shutting the **** up.

WARNING, INCREDIBLY SEXIST COMMENT BELOW:

Alas Anderson, I am a woman. Do you really expect that to happen?

[Skinwalker]

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

WARNING, INCREDIBLY SEXIST COMMENT BELOW:

Alas Anderson, I am a woman. Do you really expect that to happen?

Good for you ChotooMotoo!

[riad19]

all chicks want muslim men - Christians, Hindus. Most are polite and have good manners and dont have drinking or drug problems. And by the time most people are figuring out what major they wanna do in college, muslims guys are either in their second year of residency, law school, dental school (for the less gifted ones), or making a relatively good income in some telecom company. so whats there not to like

[Skinwalker]

Originally Posted by riad19

all chicks want muslim men - Christians, Hindus. Most are polite and have good manners and dont have drinking or drug problems. And by the time most people are figuring out what major they wanna do in college, muslims guys are either in their second year of residency, law school, dental school (for the less gifted ones), or making a relatively good income in some telecom company. so whats there not to like

I know a couple of Christian guys and they neither drink, smoke or do drugs as they say their body is the temple of the Lord. They also have impeccable manners. I think a lot of people mix up Christians with being white or American, neither of which qualifies one to be a Christian.

[Songbird]

Originally Posted by Skinwalker

I know a couple of Christian guys and they neither drink, smoke or do drugs as they say their body is the temple of the Lord. They also have impeccable manners. I think a lot of people mix up Christians with being white or American, neither of which qualifies one to be a Christian.

Gotta agree there. I know a boxer like that.

But tell me Skinwalker, could the same aforementioned guy get to know a Muslim woman and handle the "No touch" policy, practicing Muslimahs adhere to?

[IbnMardhiyah]

Originally Posted by riad19

all chicks want muslim men - Christians, Hindus. Most are polite and have good manners and dont have drinking or drug problems.

hell yeah.

or making a relatively good income in some telecom company. ...

Please update your bookmarks. I moved from telecom into IT services and consulting just last week, at Dell.