[AceOfHearts]

Here is the link to SunniaPath which teaches it is wrong to look at your spouse's private parts:

Sunnipath link: Is looking at spouse' private parts allowed?

Here is the scenario in this thread (similiar applies to all other threads that arise in disputes of religious matters):

=>The conscience is telling one that looking at the private parts of your spouse is absolutely fine.

=>Your [Un-Qur'anic] religion is telling you it is wrong to look at the private parts of your spouse.

There are three primary groups of people here in relation to the above:

1) Some of you who belong to that religion are sincere devotees, and are arguing for this Sunni teaching. However your conscience is telling you otherwise, yet because of your desire to keep in-line with the religion you follow, you are disobeying your consciences. This group is living unduely difficult lives when Allah does not require them to.

2) The second group belong to the same religion, but they are more inclined to follow their conscience and are arguing for what their consciences telling them. But they have no real basis to do so, since they are still with that religion which are against their consciences. They do not deny the teaching, but do not agree with it either and cannot be bothered to question. This group are taking up an 'ignorant' approach to religion and thus carry a guilt, but they have a strong adherence to conscience. However they are lacking the wisdom and courage to question their religion which they inherited.

3) The final group of people are those who are following their consciences as well their religion - the religion of the Qur'an. Both their consciences and their religion match up nicely and they harbour no guilt in their views. This group of people are thus able to lead a more peaceful life without guilt.

Now think about which group you belong to. Shadha is in the third group, her conscience and religion is the same. The rest are split in 1) and 2).

It is time for those in 1) and 2) to search for the truth and not blindly follow that which they inherited.

“We sent you the Scripture with the truth, confirming the Scriptures that came before it, and with final authority over them: so judge between them according to what God has sent down. Do not follow their whims, which deviate from the truth which has come to you. We have assigned a law and a path for each of you” [Qur’an 5:48]

“Have you considered those who were asked to accept judgement from God’s scripture? When they are asked to accept judgement from God’s Scripture, some of them turn their backs and walk away” [Qur’an 3:23]

“If you obeyed most of those on earth, they would lead you away from the path of God. They follow nothing but speculation – they are merely guessing.” [Qur’an 6:116]

“And We have cited in this Quran every example for the people. But man was always most argumentative.” [Qur’an 18:54]

"This is a blessed Scripture which We have sent down – follow it and be conscious of your Lord, so that you may receive mercy" [Qur’an 6:155]

"This Qur'an guides to that which is most right" [Qur'an 17:9]

"These are God's revelations that We recite to you with truth. So, in which Hadith, after God and His Revelations, do they believe?" [Qur’an 45:6]

[IbnMardhiyah]

As usual, you twist and misrepresent things to suit your ignorant thoughts.

The Sunnipath article doesn't say anywhere that its wrong to do so, so please stop claiming that.

And please stop quoting the ayaat out of context. The group you belong to is that group which takes one part of the Book but rejects the other part.

[shadha]

Musashi: Wrap yourselves in sheets, one for each, with a hole poked through 'em. There. Fumble around blindly until something goes somewhere. Problem solved. You won't even have to look at eachoter. :3

Lol, so we should have sex like the Jews eh? Maybe they could offer us some wild sheet-friendly positions.


shadha-

[AceOfHearts]

Originally Posted by IbnMardhiyah

The Sunnipath article doesn't say anywhere that its wrong to do so, so please stop claiming that.

You can hide behind the word, but it does not do away my argument. It being 'makruh' means it is not fully right to look at your spouse's private parts. It is more wrong than right.

[IbnMardhiyah]

Originally Posted by AceOfHearts

You can hide behind the word, but it does not do away my argument. It being 'makruh' means it is not fully right to look at your spouse's private parts. It is more wrong than right.

First off, you have no credible argument whatsoever, so don't make such presumptuous statements, and please don't fool yourself.

Makruh means disliked. It has nothing to do with wrong or right. And as you can see in the earlier link I posted referring to just that hadith, many commentators do not view it as makruh.

The reason why no one really takes you or your kind seriously is because you speak without authority, knowledge, or experience. You attempt to twist the ayaat of the Qur'an to your own understanding while simultaneously totally ignoring what the authoritative experts [mufassireen] have said about X, Y, or Z ayah - and not to mention your complete and wholesale rejection of the Sunnah.

[Kona_Silat]

Songbird, you are being a hypocrite. In one thread you were praising a body of a strong big black guy. You must have forgotten you haya when you had the Jungle Fever.

Originally Posted by shadha

Dang. I always dreamt of being the first real sex therapist of the Muslim World.

Neways, seems that she is doing an awesome job at it, props!


shadha-

Actuallly you can introduce Islamic sexuality to the western world.

Originally Posted by Songbird

Sister when you rant like a typical teen, it does not bode well for you and the maturity you're trying to exude.

Your glaring mistake is, you fail to look at this from an Islamic perspective and how our Nabi sAw lived.

We as Muslims don't need so-called sex-therapists, but sadly you're way too young to see this. To you, like most teenagers, you think you can save the Ummah with your counselling but you're not attacking the problem at the root cause: our failure to know our deen.

And here's a suggestion to you: read some Seerah and acquaint yourself on how our Nabi sAw lived and the Haya he exuded [and his wives] in these matters. You might learn something inshaAllah.

Oh and please cease speaking like an immature brat raised in the West. Again, it doesn't befit someone who would call themselves a lady.

Songbird, you are being a hypocrite. In one thread you were praising a body of a strong big black guy. You must have forgotten you haya when you had the Jungle Fever.

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

Okay, when you create a really excelent recipe, you make the best chocolate cake ever lets say... you want to share the recipe with others. You've mastered the art of making the most delicious desert ever, and you want everyone to know how to make it too so their chocolate cakes will be as delicious and successful as yours.

If this therapist is trying to teach others the secrets to a fulfilling intimate life, it clearly shows that she knows those secrets and is fulfulled herself. You can't teach others what you don't know. Some lightbulb when off in her head and "OMG EUREKA, I MUST share this with others!"

At least that's why my mom gave me "the talk" before I got married, so I wouldn't have to go through the same ackwardness she went through. She told me all the secrets first so I didn't have to spend lots of time being miserable hoping to figure it out for myself.

WTH?? but you're a white girl, i thought white girls had lots of sex before marriage.

Originally Posted by Arabesque

The only thing that disturbs me about this is the fact that she hosts TV shows and receives calls from viewers.

Why can't she just set up a clinic and counsel people privately? Or just have a private number and phone-time for people to call her and ask for advice.

See, even the Prophet (sAaw) when he used to answer such questions, he used to do it privately, on one-to-one basis. He didn't just decide that next jum3ah's khutbah is going to be about that. And then after the khutbah he would go, "I hope you enjoyed this detailed lecture. I'm now ready to take your questions. Yes, please? Yes, you. The sahabi with his hand up over there, right corner ... yes, please, go ahead. Now the lady sitting there, second row from behind."

It's just a matter of haya.

This a new world.

Originally Posted by Aryan_

It's on TV because not everyone is comfortable about seeing a doctor about somethign happening in their nether regions....plus it broadens the audience and saves more lives. Are you all against lives being saved?

Muslim countries are way too conservative when it comes to sex...sex was a gift from Allah to Adam and without it life on earth would be a lot more dull. You all are here because someone stuck something into someone.

I didn't know you couldn't have sex during ramadan. Damn....why did I have to find that out now?

You can have sex during ramadan..but only after fasting.

Originally Posted by Songbird

Variable, at the end of the day, you're not a Muslim who lives his life in accordance by a set of rules sent down by his Creator, Allah swt.

You live your life in complete antithesis to mine.

You have no qualms with nudity, and that's your prerogative. You probably have no problems either in dating a promiscuous woman, or a woman who has had many sexual partners too.

If you meet a girl you like, it wont matter to you how many sexual partners she's had because unlike me, you're not bound by a set of moral codes. So long as it's all consensual, then all's good right?

It is therefore futile for me to explain to you the significance of Haya in my life, and for millions of other Muslimahs. To you, we're prudes, plain and simple. We don't know how to have sex [because we weren't taught] and this is further 'hampered' or exacerbated because we can't even discuss the topic openly like good ol' Westerners do, right?

You define all this as being antiquated and restricted, but I say, thank Allah for these 'restrictions'.

I don't wish to cause any offense to you - we're both adults [though my friends will attest to my lifelong struggle to avoid such a designation] so we should be able to speak directly from the heart and mind. Without the latter and we are in the realm of superstition. Speech without the former is like a pebble rattling on a dry ground.

I feel sorry for your husband, unless he's a big black man, then you might loosen up a bit.

[Khairan]

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

snickers mini's.

But I like snickers minis.

[psychoteddybear]

Originally Posted by AceOfHearts

The issue is that not looking at your spouse's private parts is a 100% valid Sunni teaching. It means just looking for a second is MAKRUH (Disliked).

The 'brushing it under the carpet' bit is saying it means staring for hours when this is not what is being taught. You said:



They mean even looking for a second at your spouses private parts is MAKRUH, not "staring for hours". You used the concept of moderation to do away with this Sunni teaching.

Thats what I meant by 'brushing it under the carpet'

What the heck kinda post is this?

I'm done with this topic. I stand by what I said.

wa salam

[Aryan_]

How far can you go while fasting?

[shsh]

Originally Posted by Aryan_

How far can you go while fasting?

not far.


10 chatacter...

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by Kona_Silat

WTH?? but you're a white girl, i thought white girls had lots of sex before marriage.

There are always exceptions.

[WarriorAndWiseman]

What's up with everyone trying to decide how a perfectly legal, halal, married couple should have sex with each other? As if they're gonna come running to you and tell you what they did and how they did it. What they do with each other is up to themselves. Regardless of what conclusion you guys come up with here (highly unlikely), there are billions of people out there already having sex... and a lot of them don't care what you think... and those that do, well thats up to them again eh?

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by WarriorAndWiseman

there are billions of people out there already having sex... and a lot of them don't care what you think... and those that do, well thats up to them again eh?

OMG, you're not serious! How horrible, all those people out there having sex without Songbirds permision! She's gunna be upset now.