[Revert]

Dude i neevr cleaned my room to please my parents..i doubt i'd ever marry a person to please them.

[IbnMardhiyah]

Originally Posted by displaced

tell your mama that if sh continues to pressure you, when the rishta comes over, you'll tell him point blank that you have no interest in getting married.

ultimately, you're the one who'll be spending your life with the man so..don't let anyone make that decision for you.

Ditto.

Tiger786, tell your mom politely that marriage is probably the biggest decision of your life and if you're not feeling it, you're not going to accept someone she reccommends and also - tell her point blank to stop pressuring you.

Remind her how mush desies hate divorce and ask her how she would feel if you married out of pressure and then it didn't work between you and him and you ended up divorcing, how all the aunties and khaandaan and everyone would be talking about it till kingdom come.

That should give your mom a lot to think about.

And yeah, I wouldn't marry anyone just to please my parents. Because they're not the ones who are going to spend the next 50 years with her, and they're not the ones who are going to be asked on Judgement Day about her.

[Raeesa]

i know this aint no solution... but please don't do it

i know a few ppl who have and yeah its possible to live with someone, its possible to spend the rest of yr life with them but U have to wake up each day and see wat life has become, everyone else gets on and u just get left behind...

[Tiger786]

Jazak Allah Khair for all the advice. I'm just praying and making dua that Allah makes life easier on me.

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by Tiger786

Would you marry someone purely to please your parents?

No. The kind of people my dad would have wanted me to marry are the kind where I would have ended up living in some shack in the middle of an orchard without electricity or running water, barefoot, pregnant, and stuck in the kitchen making pie.

[SoSoHalalish]

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

No. The kind of people my dad would have wanted me to marry are the kind where I would have ended up living in some shack in the middle of an orchard without electricity or running water, barefoot, pregnant, and stuck in the kitchen making pie.

mmm, pie. I love pie. the only pie i've ever been able to successfully make is pumpkin pie. I want to make a good apple pie, but it just, I think it evades my paki genes or something.

[Aryan_]

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

No. The kind of people my dad would have wanted me to marry are the kind where I would have ended up living in some shack in the middle of an orchard without electricity or running water, barefoot, pregnant, and stuck in the kitchen making pie.

In Islam at least you have the other wives for company.

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by Aryan_

In Islam at least you have the other wives for company.

My parents aren't Muslim, so if I had followed their wishes I wouldn't have married a Muslim guy, which means that I wouldn't have had any co-wives to share in the misery.

[Goldi]

totally. the whole stranger thing really does it for me.

[displaced]

I probably replied to this at some point but no, I wouldn't. there are some things you don't do to please other people and marriage is one of them. I would never tie myself down to someone for a reason like that.

[fiahmad]

Heck no. Wouldn't be fair to me, not to mention my wife.


.

[Latifah]

No, never!

[wheelworks]

The choice is relatively simple. If you like the guy after praying Istikhara then marry him. If you feel Uncomfortable, then don't (or if you prefer wait a bit and see if you feel comfortable after knowing him awhile in which case if you still don't then don't marry him).