[Kona_Silat]

Asslamu Alaikum,

i just finished with fajar prayer and reciting yaseen. I appreciate the advice everyone has given me and i will give it some time before i leave. yes everything has been halal between me and her ex ept thoughts of playing mind games. i have thought about telling her a lie about me leaving early to see her reaction. i did hint at it and she asked why but i kept a closed mouth about it. i did spend time with her last night at an ice cream store and we talked for an hour before she had to leave for a company gathering. i am considering playing headgames but i dont know. i am going to jummah prayers here at one of the largest masjids here.i will make a video.

variable, youll see the videoes - provided my camera is not stolen. you can ask the mods about my ip address.

again i appreciate the responses. it is tough typing on a mobile device.

[freedomlover]

Bro if you're sincere in your love for her, keep praying and make istikhara.
Whatever you do, don't lose hope, but you cant pray and think to yourself "omg thinks are never going to work out "
You have to be hopeful and sure that Allah listens to you, and don't expect quick results.
Give her some space, and be a gentlemen towards her but don't be too keen.
You need to let her have her space for now, and dont cry and hang up on the phone.
Don't do anything irrational, although its hard sometimes to control your tears and emotions, especially when you're deeply in love with someone.
Only supplication can change fate iA. Make a promise to Allah that you will stop doing a certain sin (e.g. not waking up for fajr) and stick to your word and goal.

the Prophet (SAW) said :
“Righteous deeds increase one’s lifespan. Supplication affect what is predestined. A man loses what he has (or can gain), due to sins.”
Ibn Majah and Ahmad

Salman related that the Prophet (SAW) said,
“Destiny can only be deterred by supplication.”

Concerning this the Prophet (SAW) said,
“Whoever invokes Allah to have something, Allah will surely give him what he asks for, or will remove some evil which is impending unless he asks for the committing of a sin or to severe the ties of kinship”.
Muslim

[Aryan_]

Originally Posted by Kona_Silat

Asslamu Alaikum,

i just finished with fajar prayer and reciting yaseen. I appreciate the advice everyone has given me and i will give it some time before i leave. yes everything has been halal between me and her ex ept thoughts of playing mind games. i have thought about telling her a lie about me leaving early to see her reaction. i did hint at it and she asked why but i kept a closed mouth about it. i did spend time with her last night at an ice cream store and we talked for an hour before she had to leave for a company gathering. i am considering playing headgames but i dont know. i am going to jummah prayers here at one of the largest masjids here.i will make a video.

What was the ice cream like?

[raatkirani2005]

Originally Posted by Kona_Silat

i love her so much. I wonder if maybe that her feelings might change again if we talk in private. I do not know. Or perhaps once someone stops feeling for you ..then that is it.

I'm so sorry to hear that it hasn't been all peaches and cream for you since you arrived in Indonesia. If it's possible, have a frank discussion with her. You traveled so far to meet her, the least she can do is tell you why her feelings have changed. If she no longer has feelings for you, at least try to enjoy the country you are in. And keep your eyes open. Who knows? You might meet someone new.

[Revert]

Originally Posted by TdotGirl

Kona, next time get emotionally attached to them after you're married. word. that goes for the rest of you punks.

That seems like an unusual thing to say? Could you elaborate?

[sally]

Originally Posted by TdotGirl

Kona, next time get emotionally attached to them after you're married. word. that goes for the rest of you punks.

tdotgirl for president

[zzze]

assalamu alaykum

Originally Posted by MuslimZ

word. this is quite the truth.
try, try again. pray. then try some more.

I agree. She may just be getting nervous over everything, getting cold feet. Prove to her how serious you are (she may have high expectations of romantic gestures...) also you said she was married before and he was abusive, so this may be playing a part in her withdrawing from you.

Originally Posted by sally

tdotgirl for president

So like, never meet ur husband/wife to be? That seems the only way not to be emotionally attached to your potential wife. It'll always hurt if ''rishtas'' don't work out - get used to it.

[Jack_Sparrow]

your country is backwards. are you going to make her do this?

YouTube - Indonesian Teeth Chiseling

[zakk]

I'm just another heart in need of rescue
Waiting on love's sweet charity
An' I'm gonna hold on
For the rest of my days
Cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams


Sing it, bro.

[shadha]

Damn, that blows.


shadha-

[Khairan]

Originally Posted by TdotGirl

Kona, next time get emotionally attached to them after you're married. word. that goes for the rest of you punks.

There isn't a snowball's chance in hell that I'd risk committing the rest of my life to a person I didn't know well enough to form emotional attachment to. Every marriage is a leap of faith -- but there has to be something about the person that makes them different from everybody else on the street and makes that leap worth it.

[iTz_NoT_Me_iTzZu]

Sorry to hear that Kona, hope you guys can patch things up inshaAllah

Originally Posted by Khairan

There isn't a snowball's chance in hell that I'd risk committing the rest of my life to a person I didn't know well enough to form emotional attachment to. Every marriage is a leap of faith -- but there has to be something about the person that makes them different from everybody else on the street and makes that leap worth it.

Yeah definitely...

[sally]

Originally Posted by Khairan

There isn't a snowball's chance in hell that I'd risk committing the rest of my life to a person I didn't know well enough to form emotional attachment to. Every marriage is a leap of faith -- but there has to be something about the person that makes them different from everybody else on the street and makes that leap worth it.

hi, my name is indecisiveness. cuz i agree with that too

khairan for president

[zakk]

Originally Posted by Khairan

There isn't a snowball's chance in hell that I'd risk committing the rest of my life to a person I didn't know well enough to form emotional attachment to. Every marriage is a leap of faith -- but there has to be something about the person that makes them different from everybody else on the street and makes that leap worth it.

I THINK what she may have meant is not to get attached to the point where you're weeping in your room because the first time someone meets you face to face, she didn't feel the click.