paternity tests

GOTFIVEONIT · #1 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 04:17 AM

when that day arrives that you should ever have kids fellaz, make sure you get a paternity test done BEFORE you sign the birth certificate. it's what i plan on doing. even if though its your own wife, you wanna test her faithfulness? get a paternity test done!

because once you sign that birth certificate, stating your the father, your stuck with that kid till they turn 18, even if the child is not yours to begin with.

like kane west said in his gold digger song, talking about how he knew a guy who had to pay child support till he found when the kid turned 18 it turned out it wasnt his.

just watch maury povich and look at all those paternity tests, cheating wives, men raising kids who had no idea the child wasnt even their's to begin with.

PhDGirl · #2 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 04:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GOTFIVEONIT

when that day arrives that you should ever have kids fellaz, make sure you get a paternity test done BEFORE you sign the birth certificate. it's what i plan on doing. even if though its your own wife, you wanna test her faithfulness? get a paternity test done!

because once you sign that birth certificate, stating your the father, your stuck with that kid till they turn 18, even if the child is not yours to begin with.

like kane west said in his gold digger song, talking about how he knew a guy who had to pay child support till he found when the kid turned 18 it turned out it wasnt his.

just watch maury povich and look at all those paternity tests, cheating wives, men raising kids who had no idea the child wasnt even their's to begin with.

So let me get this straight. After your wife goes through labor, you're going to ask for a paternity test within 48 hours? Wow, that's bold!

Jetmir · #3 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 05:14 AM

Why would even marry someone if youre gonna have doubts about something this important.

zakk · #4 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 08:35 AM

why wait? you can get in utero paternity testing done these days. That way even your faithful wife will have plenty of time to send all the baby stuff to her new apartment. And your unfaithful wife will have the peace of mind knowing that she can still carry on with her business, bc, hey, at least the kid is yours and you'll never suspect otherwise. Of course, knowing you, even if the kid is yours, I'm sure you'll have the foresight to have her under 24 hour surveillance. yummy.

sixpakistan · #5 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GOTFIVEONIT

when that day arrives that you should ever have kids fellaz, make sure you get a paternity test done BEFORE you sign the birth certificate. it's what i plan on doing. even if though its your own wife, you wanna test her faithfulness? get a paternity test done!

because once you sign that birth certificate, stating your the father, your stuck with that kid till they turn 18, even if the child is not yours to begin with.

like kane west said in his gold digger song, talking about how he knew a guy who had to pay child support till he found when the kid turned 18 it turned out it wasnt his.

just watch maury povich and look at all those paternity tests, cheating wives, men raising kids who had no idea the child wasnt even their's to begin with.

You've never been in a relationship, have you?

I recommend you seek better sources for advice on life & relationships than rap songs & daytime TV talk shows.

sally · #6 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 08:58 AM

how ridiculously insulting

Jamroll · #7 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zakk

why wait? you can get in utero paternity testing done these days. That way even your faithful wife will have plenty of time to send all the baby stuff to her new apartment. And your unfaithful wife will have the peace of mind knowing that she can still carry on with her business, bc, hey, at least the kid is yours and you'll never suspect otherwise. Of course, knowing you, even if the kid is yours, I'm sure you'll have the foresight to have her under 24 hour surveillance. yummy.

Hmm, I did not know that. They sound pretty useful. I wonder why they don't use those on Maury or Jeremy Kyle.

Pushpa · #8 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 09:12 AM

If the only girl who will marry a guy is a hoe then of course he will need a paternity test.

Although I say, if a guy has no better hopes than to marry a hoe, he should just stay celibate and spare the world of the possibility of his omega genes being passed onto his offspring.

Jamroll · #9 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 09:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pushpa

If the only girl who will marry a guy is a hoe then of course he will need a paternity test.

Although I say, if a guy has no better hopes than to marry a hoe, he should just stay celibate and spare the world of the possibility of his omega genes being passed onto his offspring.

Well sometimes you don't realise your partner is a ho' (or other such nouns depicting infidelity) until later. In these cases, it's good to have Jeremy Kyle on speed-dial.

DramaRani · #10 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 09:17 AM

If a guy was so insecure and always has doubts about his wife cheating, I would naturally think that he was trying to hide something himself. May be another woman or relationship (these days, guys will cheat on girls with other guys and then say they aren't gay, but just like being with boys

).

ChotooMotoo · #11 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 09:31 AM

Your girlfriend had a positive test, refuses to have an abortion, and you want to try and wiggle out of your responsibilities by requiring a paternity test eh? Why do the crime if you're not willing to do the time? Condoms aren't that expensive.

Pushpa · #12 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 09:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jamroll

Well sometimes you don't realise your partner is a ho' (or other such nouns depicting infidelity) until later. In these cases, it's good to have Jeremy Kyle on speed-dial.

Nah, man, you can spot one a mile off and if you're delusional enough to marry/procreate with her in the first place, why shatter it after the kid's born? Ignorance is bliss and all that.

Jamroll · #13 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 09:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pushpa

Nah, man, you can spot one a mile off and if you're delusional enough to marry/procreate with her in the first place, why shatter it after the kid's born? Ignorance is bliss and all that.

Some people look angelic, like butter wouldn't melt, but then you find out that they are running an underground Moulin Rouge, and sleeping with your best friend's neighbour's dog's vet's brother!!!

Pushpa · #14 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 09:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jamroll

Some people look angelic, like butter wouldn't melt, but then you find out that they are running an underground Moulin Rouge, and sleeping with your best friend's neighbour's dog's vet's brother!!!

Only someone who had 'mug' written all over him would attract a girl like that. And in that case, it serves him right.

Jamroll · #15 (**permalink**) 02-11-2008, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pushpa

Only someone who had 'mug' written all over him would attract a girl like that. And in that case, it serves him right.

Why would it be his fault? Maybe he's not a suspicious sort of person. Maybe he's trusting and loving. If someone is innocent, or naive, why would it serve them right? So harsh. Is there no love left in this world?