[IbnMardhiyah]

Originally Posted by zzze

asslamau alaykum

and 10-15 babies? Poor lady

well, that's what I'd like ... in reality there's probably a slim chance of that happening. And no, some girls I know have said [without prompting] that they'd like to have about 10 - 12 kids, and you could tell that [physically] they could handle that many, too.

I'll take whatever Allah gives, though.

[zzze]

assalamu alaykum

How can you tell whether a woman is phsycically able to take having that many children?

Insha Allah khair, the only women I know who have that many kids are palestinians

[Timbit]

Originally Posted by YOUSUFofSD

btw kids dont ruin or mess with your life, if anything they make it worth much more, and then by default you enjoy things alot more because they just bring joy to everyone they come into contact with.

Actually, that's kind of true.
But only when they're little.

Originally Posted by Purple_alien

I had a plan to have babies, but I wanted them out of the way by the time I was 27. Since I am 25, there is no time for me to find a guy, get to know him, get married and have a baby. So there will be no little purple aliens.

Why 27?

[IbnMardhiyah]

Originally Posted by zzze

How can you tell whether a woman is phsycically able to take having that many children?

Skills.

Insha Allah khair, the only women I know who have that many kids are palestinians

My grandmother had nine that survived childbirth and grew up healthy, and she wasn't Palestinian.

The sis I know that made that comment btw, is a mix ... Russian, Irish and Native American ... no Palestinian blood at all.

[Laimuun]

plans? haha. you can make plans, but sometimes Allah reminds you that He has different plans for you. but alhamdulillah.

now that we have one on the way, we're trying to readjust our career/school/living plans around it and praying things work out for the best. like zakk said, flexibility is key.

as for how many, etc.. we want around 4/5 of our own. and we've talked seriously of adopting a child, preferably after we've had 2 or so of our own. and we'd also like to foster. though again, after we've had a few kids of our own. I'd like to have a bit of experience raising my own children before taking on the huge task of caring and providing for another's child. Allah willing.

[shadha]

zzze: lol, yes, that sounds like a PLAN.

Yay, then we can go for surgery togetherrrr!


shadha-

[sally]

i dont know if all the single guys who are realllyyyy into the idea of having 6+ kids really know that giving birth so many times can leave stretch marks on the body of a woman. which dont really go away

[Variable]

If I ever convince myself I want kids... I'd be plenty happy with one or two. I don't know where this desire for aggressive seed spreading comes from.

[IbnMardhiyah]

Originally Posted by sally

i dont know if all the single guys who are realllyyyy into the idea of having 6+ kids really know that giving birth so many times can leave stretch marks on the body of a woman. which dont really go away

sally, you might be assuming / presuming that I wouldn't want my wife to have stretch marks, or that, I would want her to be a skinny model, or whatever.

But I'm very much aware that having that many kids can take its toll on a woman's body, but I don't mind. And if she doesn't mind either because she knows that I don't, then so much the better.

My mom had seven pregnancies, six of which resulted in healthy rockin' sockin' kids. My eldest sister is on #4 at the moment, and my 2nd sister is helping herself to a second serving. And, I have these mad observation skills yo. [All three of my sisters look FYNE, mashallah]

besides, more kids = more rowanaq

Originally Posted by Variable

I don't know where this desire for aggressive seed spreading comes from.

Its all relative, dude. I came from what many Westerners would consider a large family [six kids] although ironically, five of those six were born in the West. My mom came from a family of nine kids, and my dad, I can't remember ... seven or something.

If anything, non-Muslim, Western men have a much greater propensity to be spreading their seed by sleeping around so much, but they do it without responsibility, and so the women have to be poppin' the pill or getting an abortion.

[sally]

its not just about outer appearence or necessarily just the figure of a woman whos given birth so many times.. but theres very noticable marks on the body etc

anyway i feel weird/half bad about elaborating on this more because i think being able to carry a child or multiple children is a blessing from Allah SWT, and delivering them even moreso..and so maybe i sound like a 'feminazi' or something..which isnt true.

[sally]

its definitely very interesting learning more about pregnancy experiences from actual women who've been through it..since im not the type to uh really want to google such things on my own..i dont wanna read stuff that freaks me out..until i have to

but i heard from one woman that her foot/shoe size increased considerably after her first and only sons birth..and that was mind boggling..i mean whoever thought your foot could become BIGGER?

anyways, then there was someone else who said her foot size decreased, i think. not sure abt that. but yeah, interesting stuff.

[shadha]

Variable: If I ever convince myself I want kids... I'd be plenty happy with one or two. I don't know where this desire for aggressive seed spreading comes from.

Seriously.

But then again, a lot of my number preference is based upon how my body looks in the aftermath of pregnancy. I already intend on having reconstructive surgery once we hit our desired number, though if **** starts to hit the fan after our first child, I would seriously be very reluctant to have another.

My husband says the change of body is natural and he doesn't mind [so he says now ], but I mind and seeing as it's my body, me minding means a whole lot. Given his stance on me having reconstructive surgery, I'm sure I'll have to foot that bill but that's more than fine and totally worth it to me.

That's not to say all women look a hot mess after pregnancy, this is just my opinion on how I would view my body.


shadha-

[sally]

the bottom line is yeah, giving birth takes an absolute toll on the body of a woman..and emotionally is hard also but i guess we're also blessed with an extra soft heart for the same reason..so that we end up looking past just what things look like on the outside

but still, given that our society is so incredibly focused on looks (and i only mean the looks of women) and we've been brought up to be so conscious about every little thing...i just gotta give props to all the women who've dealt with the pressure and kids and everything..mashaAllah..it must be hard..

[IbnMardhiyah]

Originally Posted by sally

...i just gotta give props to all the women who've dealt with the pressure and kids and everything..mashaAllah..it must be hard..

having husbands who aren't so superficial helps loads.

having husbands who want some meat on their women, and don't want a sack of bones, helps even more.

[Variable]

Originally Posted by IbnMardhiyah

If anything, non-Muslim, Western men have a much greater propensity to be spreading their seed by sleeping around so much, but they do it without responsibility, and so the women have to be poppin' the pill or getting an abortion.

Ever hear of condoms? It's this revolutionary new technology.