Inside the World of Penny Pinchers
Just how far will someone go to pinch a few pennies? The latest installment of the "Cheapest Person I Know" series exposes the annoying and endearing frugal habits of those near and (sometimes not-so) dear.
Can you top any of these tales?
Cheapest Ex I Know
Submitted by: LadyCroibhriste
I happened to notice when I was visiting my ex-mother-in-law that it appeared my ex-husband was wearing some sort of dental thing in his mouth. I asked my her and she said no ... it was Super Glue. His top teeth had so many pinhole cavities, chips and cracks that he kept "resurfacing" his top teeth until it built up. It looked like one of those teeth protectors that kids wear when they play football except it tobacco-brown. Reason no. 1758 why I'm not married to that man.
The Trouble With Day-Old Newspaper
Submitted by: Leroytopeka2
When I was a kid, my father used to bring home the day-old newspaper from work. It was not so bad having to read yesterday's news. The main problem was that yesterday's news would become next week's toilet tissue. After everyone was done reading the paper, he would tear it into "3x8" strips and place them in a nice neat stack in a little basket beside the toilet in the bathrooms.
Breathing in Cheap
Submitted by: Douglalder
I told my dad how much easier I found it to breathe at night using the stick-on nasal strips that go on the outside of your nose. He was going to use them until he found out they were about 50 cents each. Instead, he found an old spiral type notebook and pulled out two of the black plastic spirals. He compressed them and stuck them up his nostrils. They expanded more than expected and he got them stuck in his nostrils, and looked like a scary gorilla with enormous black nostrils!
Charlie Brown Christmas Tree
Submitted by: CA1022
I will tell you what cheap is: 29 years ago, my sister-in-law and her husband were celebrating their first Christmas together. We all know how special the first Christmas is with our spouse. Well that cheap-o went out, found the cheapest, ugliest tree and had the nerve to ask the tree attendant for extra tree branches so he could drill holes in the bark of his cheap tree to fill in the spaces.
Frugal Fanny
Submitted by: Goldnhorizons
While working as a teller, my favorite customer was an elderly, homeless lady. The first time I helped her, I was taken aback by her crumpled and worn clothing. Hobbling up to my window just before the close of business, she placed a red cloth bag on the counter and requested I count and deposit her funds. The bag had a total of $23.12 in crumpled $1.00 bills and change. Much to my amazement, her savings account had a whopping $1,207,000.00! Now that's pinching pennies.
Mail Fraud
Submitted by: LoriBNJ
My friend's Dad used to put the person he wanted his mail to go to in the return address area, and purposely forget postage. When it was returned, it wasn't returned to him; it was brought to the person he wanted to send it to!
Dodging the Check
Submitted by: Deborahctroy
A large group of friends would go out after the theater. One professional man would order the cheapest thing on the menu, then when others were finished eating, he would finish whatever was on their plates. When the check came he would grab it first, then pass it on without putting his money in. When it came back around to him there was always enough to cover the check and tip and he would put in a dollar.
Frugal Extremes
Submitted by: Anonymous
While shopping at a roadside fruit stand, I watched my friend Wally remove the stems from the cherries he was buying. I asked him why and he said they would weigh less at checkout. Wally also only allows his turn signals to flash two times because, according to him, the bulbs will last longer!
Gimme Gas Money
Submitted by: Glendale05
I know someone who ... on the way to your house, stops at a store and will call to see if you need something. If you say yes when she gets to your house she will ask you for gas money.
Free Tomato Soup
Submitted by: JPHUF
Back in 1969, one employee in my department would have a totally free lunch every day comprising of: many packets of ketchup, salt & pepper, hot water, several packets of saltine crackers, glass of cold water.
This man was a fifty-ish engineer. Everyone eventually knew what he was doing but I guess he had no shame.
Extreme Recycling
Submitted by: Marylindah
My ex-boss used to water down the Windex bottle and hang up the paper towels to dry and reuse them on the glass.
Humble Hubby
Submitted by: The Mrs.
My sweet husband is so cheap -- when he wears a hole in the sole of his moccasins, he uses the cardboard from a used pizza box to re-sole them! He makes over $100,000 a year too. That is why I love him -- he is humble.
How to Save Electricity
Submitted by: civilguy27
While growing up, my next door neighbor disconnected the light to his doorbell to save on electricity.
The Cheapest Death
Submitted by: Compukenny
I worked for an old high school friend at a time that I was between jobs. I had always heard stories of how cheap he and his parents were. When his grandmother passed away he refused the funeral homes charges for the hearse. He rented a black minivan instead to transport his grandmother's casket to the cemetery.
Since When Does Food Go Bad?
Submitted by: HGCHarlan
My dad is SO cheap he once took a slimy, rotten chicken out of the refrigerator and soaked it in vinegar to "de-slime" it before he cooked it. He expected us to actually EAT it ... as he was doing. He makes Scrooge look like a spend thrift.
Pantyhose That Last
Submitted by: JRZUB
I had a cheap friend that when she had a run in her panty hose, she would cut the leg off and wear just the top half, so she would have a pair made from two pairs.
Calendar Cycles
Submitted by: Fehlau3
In western society, the years run on a cycle, every year is one of 14 different patterns. The cycle would be shorter if there were no leap year. So I save all my large calendars, I never write on them of things to do or appointments; I use post-it notes instead. And when the next year like this one comes around, I can reuse an old calendar.
What Pockets Are Made For
Submitted by: IsprayLiz
The cheapest I know of was a mailman my brother-in-law worked with. A bunch of mailmen would stop for coffee in the morning and this guy would pocket the extra creamers when they finished.
Cheaper Than Plastic Flowers
Submitted by: Anonymous
My ex-husband was so cheap. He bought me candy and flowers for Valentine's Day. He said I could look at the flowers for about an hour and have one piece of the candy and then he took the candy and the flowers to his mother and his sister for their Valentine's gifts.
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LOL. My favorite is the last one.
Extreme Ways To Save Money - LOL
