[sally]

This isn't very funny. But neither are more than 3/4ths of the posts in here.

We went to Party City for Mehendi/Henna party supplies. I was with my friends British cousin who's visiting and we were extremely sleep deprived and absolutely loaded with work needing to be done and most of all, hungry.

Myself to the cashier: Do you guys have paan leaves? Please tell me you have paan leaves. I don't want to go to anymore stores.

Her: Umm, what?

Me: Ok never mind, bye.

We left the store and were cracking up because her facial expression was priceless. It was pretty dark outside and there was maybe like one more couple in the parking lot who gave us the weirdest looks known to mankind. So we get in and the cashier lady comes running. I'm thinking, what the heck? My friend rolled down her window and the lady just handed her her cellphone that she forgot inside.

[sally]

I was trying to wake up my friend in the morning and she's one heavy sleeper.

Me: Dude, wake up. A hurricane is supposed to hit the city in a couple hours and we need to evacuate NOW!

(worked like a charm)

[Anderson]

I was walking with my little brother and out of nowhere he started acting out a scene from heroes, with all the voices- Peter Petrelli, the Irish girl. lol that was well funny.

[zakk]

so, apparently the batteries in the flashlight leaked.

Haneef: MOMMY! The battery did hagoo in the flashlight!!!!

[shadha]

So it's dumb early in the morning and my dad comes knocking on the door, opening it, and starts his stuff...

"It's Fajr time. Let's go lazy. Get up. It's Fajr time......it's Fajr time.....IT'S FAJR TIME! Not hammer time, but FAJR TIME! It's FAJR TIME yeaaahhh it's FAJR TIME! FAJR TIME!".

*under my pillow* "Oh my god you NEED to leave."


shadha-

[ChotooMotoo]

So, this weekend I went home, and my sister, her husband, her old roomate and me were all driving to my mom's house. Apparently she and her old roomate (who is male) and this other guy all got hungry long long ago, and had no money. My sister had a solution to this problem. She called up the pizza place, and did this phone sex voice. Apparently this worked, becuase it was a delicious pizza and arrived in record time. When the pizza arrived, her two male roomates opened the door. The delivery guy had a total deer in the headlights look.

My sister never told this story to her husband. IT was really funny to see his reaction to the news that his wife once got free pizza by pretending to be a phone sex operator.

[iTz_NoT_Me_iTzZu]

dinner:


*me cutting whole chicken*

me: "mmm my favorite piece is the wing, it's so little and cute!"
sister: "thats a weird way to describe something you're about to eat....."
me: "well maybe i should've used different wording.."
sister:"or maybe you should just keep weird stuff like that to yourself"
me:"shut up! I don't have to explain myselves to you!......err myself...."

yeah it doesn't sound that funny now but it was funny then

[IbnMardhiyah]

Originally Posted by iTz_NoT_Me_iTzZu

me: "mmm my favorite piece is the wing, it's so little and cute!"
sister: "thats a weird way to describe something you're about to eat....."

... isnt that why we love to eat little babies?

Cute, little, plump and delicious.

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by IbnMardhiyah

... isnt that why we love to eat little babies?

Cute, little, plump and delicious.

hmmm.... veal.....

[zakk]

Originally Posted by ChotooMotoo

hmmm.... veal.....

well your name is chotoomotoo. are you cute and delicious as well?

[ChotooMotoo]

Originally Posted by zakk

well your name is chotoomotoo. are you cute and delicious as well?

Cute, yes. Delicious.... well my Auntie used to say that when I baked cakes, I don't need to add any sugar, just put my finger in the batter becuase I'm so sweet.

[zakk]

cool. right now I might fall into the delicious category because I have masala coming out of my pores.

come to think of it, I'm short and fat too. I guess I should bust out the bare minerals and work on the cute part.

[vegetables]

Not funny just weird as hell...

I was coming home on the subway and theres this paki dude sitting across from me. Then this uncle dude just starts ranting to me in urdu for about 10 minutes..something about jews and kafirs.. on a crowded train ; little did he know that Im a cultural deviant and don't understand urdu.

[IbnMardhiyah]

When we were in highschool, a common conversation of the eyes, followed up with a statement from the lips would be like this:

Me, going up the stairs.
Friend of mine, making out with his girl, coming down the stairs.

Me and him lock eyes, letting only our eyes move, both of our eyes locked in a twisted sneer .... and then right when we were both abreast, with me going upstairs and him facing downstairs ... I'd just belt it out:

"You are ... SO unbelievably UGLY."

And then I'd keep walking up the steps.

[nooni]

Originally Posted by TariqBinSleepin

HOly crap are you serious? YOu shoulda taken off your chappal and gone, Heres you're present. What were you wearing by the way, just curious.

maybe ur the weird guy she was talking about

Originally Posted by Sapphire