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05-19-2008, 11:10 PM
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
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Originally Posted by vegetables
then she should go to the pharmacy for some happy pills 
i made a glass of ice tea... with ice.. 
my brother starts eyeing it so im like fine. this kid takes a gulp and catches an ice cube. then he spits the cube back into the glass.
me: im at a loss of words.
him: WHAAT WAS I SPOUSED TO DO WITH IT
if everyone wasn't sleeping, there would have been alot of screaming that night  |
lol same brother as the girl scout cookies one? he seems like a cute kid mA
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 "The shortest distance between a problem and a solution is the distance between your knees and the floor. The one who kneels to The Almighty can stand up to anything." |
05-19-2008, 11:13 PM
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
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A mi llama se le ha caido una pata y querria comprar una rueda de repuesto, por favor . 
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05-19-2008, 11:44 PM
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say whaaat?
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
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Originally Posted by fatima
lol same brother as the girl scout cookies one? he seems like a cute kid mA
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yep. hes the only one that can get away with things like that |
05-19-2008, 11:54 PM
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
Quote:
Originally Posted by vegetables
yep. hes the only one that can get away with things like that
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he sounds very entertaining 
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When Sulayman ibn AbdulMalik visited Makkah, he asked if there was anyone present who has met the companions of RasulAllah (saw).
“Abu Hazim,” they replied.
“Why is it that we dislike death? Why is it we don't want to die?” Sulayman asked.
Abu Hazim replied, “Because you have built and established this world and you have destroyed your Aakhirah, so you hate to go from what you have established to what you have destroyed.”
يا نفس ويحك ما الذي يرضيك في دنيا العفن؟
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05-20-2008, 07:15 AM
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
Quote:
Originally Posted by shadha
I'm at a bridal shower last night for a sister who is getting married.
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 Omg, that's hilarious.
I remember when my 4-year-old cousin did something like that to my friend. But my friend isn't married so the question was if she sleeps with her mom. 
Kids are weird. 
So in one my Religion classes, we were talking about Islamic eschatology. The prof was talking about what happens to the soul after we die, and stuff... but somebody brought up an interesting point, which made me turn to my friend sitting next to me (who knows more than me about these things) and ask:
"Does it join with God?" (the soul)
And he goes: "Is it ever separate?"
That wasn't funny or anything. It just made me smile.
Okay, here's a funny one. My dad comes home all excited and first thing he says is:
Guess what, [Timbit]? You know our neighbours? Their daughter got into law school!
Me: Which neighbours?
So he's trying to explain it to me but I have no idea who he's talking about and neither do any of my siblings. He's like:
You know... So-and-so Sahib's daughter? Her name is so-and-so?
So then my big bro finally figured out who he's talking about and he's like: Ohhhhhhhh, her. Dad, she got into Windsor.
At which point we all started laughing.
My dad: Whatever. Me and your mom are going over there tomorrow to congratulate them.
My mom: *sigh* I had never imagined that I would have such useless offspring. If I had known...
Me: What would you have done if you'd known, Mom? Aborted us?
My dad:  Naheen!
That was funny 'cause I didn't think he was even listening.
 
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And those who strive in Our (cause),- We will certainly guide them to our Paths: For verily Allah is with those who do right (Qur'an 29:69).
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05-20-2008, 09:46 AM
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No really, I'm a brother.
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
Quote:
Originally Posted by shadha
I'm at a bridal shower last night for a sister who is getting married.
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hahahaha that's hilarious!
one time when this couple i know got nikkah'd, the groom's niece (5 years old maybe?) comes up to ME and goes "congratulations!"
me: 
her: aren't you the new dulhan??
me:
oh and, this group of 5 year old girls were PSYCHOS at my wedding... at all the events they'd be stuck to me like glue and were really annoying and obnoxious. after the wedding was over and everything, i was reading the messsages in the guestbook. one of those girls wrote a love letter to my husband i'll have to find it and type it up for yall.. its hilarious. |
05-20-2008, 10:22 AM
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
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Originally Posted by sumiyia
oh and, this group of 5 year old girls were PSYCHOS at my wedding... at all the events they'd be stuck to me like glue and were really annoying and obnoxious. after the wedding was over and everything, i was reading the messsages in the guestbook. one of those girls wrote a love letter to my husband i'll have to find it and type it up for yall.. its hilarious. |
ahahahhaah
one time, my cousin and his bride of a few weeks and our family and everybody was chilling..my brother was like barely 6. he looked at my cousins wife, who was all decked out etc and goes, 'mai bara ho kar ____ baji sey shaadi karonga'
"when i grow up i'm gonna marry her" |
05-20-2008, 12:04 PM
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Thera Baap
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
My roommate is a genius, which makes this more funny. This happened when we decided to take pictures at night:
Roommate: Dude, does your camera have night vision?
Friend: um, what do you mean?
Roommate: You know....vision at night?
Friend: You mean a flash?
Roommate: Yeah!
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A companion of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "The Prophet asked us to do seven things: to visit the sick, to follow funeral processions, to seek God's mercy for someone who sneezes, to return greetings, to help those who are wronged, to accept invitations, and to fulfill our oaths and promises."
Sahih Al-Bukhari, Volume 3, Hadith 625
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05-20-2008, 06:47 PM
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
My dad loves to harass the kids of family friends. Now matter how small they are, he'll tease them and bug them and generally be a goof off.
Baba: I want that toy. Please share with me.
4 year old kid: No.
Baba: You have to be nice to kids who are younger than you... did you know I'm younger than you?
kid: I know *clutches toy closer* but you won't get this.
Poor thing, didn't even bother arguing about the age!
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But will you shall not, unless God wills, the Lord of all Being. -At-Takwir, 81: 29
Surgeon General's warning: She only looks sweet and innocent. 
To avoid criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing. - unknown
'Dawah' is not arabic for 'being really annoying.' - a really wise Islamican
If you educate a boy, you educate an individual. If you educate a girl, you educate a community. - African proverb
http://therabs.blogspot.com
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05-20-2008, 07:55 PM
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
I was subbing in a second grade class the other day. I've subbed in that class a few times, so the students are "used to" me.
Student: Miss H, do you have kids?
Me: No 
Student: Oh. Do you have a husband  ?
Me: No .
Student: A fiance?
Me: No  .
Student: A boyfriend?
Me: No  .
Student: My daddy's single .
Me: That's nice . *turns around to wash the boards*
The little girl has all of the makings of a Desi aunty. This was almost as humorous as the time one of my old first graders told me that she colored a picture with me and "some guy" in the woods. It was actually a picture of Sleeping Beauty and Prince Phillip walking through the forest hand-in-hand.
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"Those who remember God and those who do not are as different from each other as the living and the dead." - Hadith of Bukhari & Muslim
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05-21-2008, 03:06 PM
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Girly Man
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
Me and my family were in the car discussing my career plans:
Me: I can be a jack.....ess... of all trades... Wait a JANE of all trades
Mom & Sister:
Sister: I think you had it right the first time... jackass!
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But it's better than drinkin' alone
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05-21-2008, 03:38 PM
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Fire of Life
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
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Originally Posted by Bluestar
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Yep, I did! Why is that so hard to believe?
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We despise all reverences and all the objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our own list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us.
Mark Twain
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05-21-2008, 03:41 PM
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Fire of Life
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
Security: My memory is bad. For me, a week is two days ago. Then there's the weekend, that really messes me up.
Me: Well, lay off the alcohol. It kills memory cells. Of course, I don't know why I'm telling you this because you're only going to forget it anyway.
Security: You're right!.... Anyway, you're going to the thirtieth floor.
Me: Thanks. Now what were we talking about again?
Security: Baseball.
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We despise all reverences and all the objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our own list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us.
Mark Twain
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05-21-2008, 03:46 PM
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Re: Cracked Out Real Life Conversations
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Originally Posted by Blue_Phoenix
Yep, I did! Why is that so hard to believe?
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It's not hard to believe, it's quality
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I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
Groucho Marx
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05-21-2008, 10:06 PM
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