[DramaRani]

Originally Posted by Salika

I remember once I talked with my flat mate about the issue... She really bullied me!

At 4:30am (yes, really, no exaggeration) she decided to cook and listen to music and the TV all at the same time. I asked her to turn it down and she said "no, I can't, if I turn the water on, I can't hear the music" then I was like "umm, I'm trying to sleep" and she was like "ok, fine, I'll turn it down one notch.."

Later the morning, she accused me of how I was being inconsiderate by making her cater to my needs. Just because I'm sleeping doesn't mean she has to be extra quiet (even if it's 4:30am). On top of that, she started to tell me how my friends and I were loud when they were over the previous week and she was trying to study (as if now is no better time to bring it up, right? )

Don't kill me for saying this, but you know when you confront someone about their inconsiderate behavior, it just makes you a target. No matter how nicely you say something, you really open up yourself for an attack too. She probably felt that you and your friends were being "inconsiderate" while she was studying and she (at the time) didn't say anything and just let roll off of her back. So she assumed you would do the same with the music at 4:30 am. I don't agree with her. Maybe you and your friends didn't know that you were being "loud" or that she was even studying.

Originally Posted by thejellymill

DR, take deep breaths...it helps sometimes. I hope you feel better

I havent gotten the chance yet to buy earplugs and the roomie in the room adjacent to mine is internet-chatting very loudly to her family abroad (something that happens often and stretches on for hours). The other one's listening to the presidential debate quite loudly in the living room which is also right next to my room.

Please make dua that I grow a spine because I'm trying to convince myself to ask them to keep it down. I feel like such a pest

Thanks Things worked out in my favor, Alhumdulillah.

Anyway, I think you should say something to your roommates, but it shouldn't be where you are confronting one roommate and any other roommates gang up on you. I think you should make it into an entire "house" meeting. Maybe at that time you can set up some rules or something. Maybe having designated quiet times where there is absolute silence and other times where its a bit relaxed, if family and friends are coming over. Its so hard living with other people (I live with my parents and they are LOUD). Anyway, there needs to be compromise on both ends or else, I don't think your roommates will take you seriously, you know what I mean? They'll just think you care about yourself and aren't respecting their needs as well. Maybe you can have some sort of signal for when they are being too loud - maybe three quick knocks on the door and they know to take it down. I dunno.