Re: Marriage Contract
Um, even if the law attempts to uphold the document, he can easily become a deadbeat. And it's fairly hard to pursue.
The thing is, if you want to have a contract, that's fine. But ultimately a sheet of paper or even a court of law won't stop an idiot from finding a new way to be an idiot. This is why we marry people that we know to be good Muslims, because when a marriage has to come down to contracts, arbritration, mediation, or anything which indicates the marriage is in conflict, it's no longer his affection for you, but his fear and love of Allah that will keep him treating you right and respecting the agreements between you. It is in these times of conflict that each party must remember their own responsibility to Allah, and not cause more conflict by getting overly upset. Also, it helps to remember in those times, that Allah is the ultimate Provider and Sustainer. Our Iman is not on our wealth, our marriage, or our stipulations to provide for us; rather Allah provides for us through those things, and can certainly provide for us without those things, as long as we can remain calm and steadfast.
It can be a real problem if you wholeheartedly expect the law to do a whole lot for you.
Anyway, I didn't have a contract beyond the marriage certificate stipulating the mahr.
Also, I've met girls who are so anti doing anything related to getting more than a few token things for mahr, but put quite a few really nit picky things in the contract. Which to me is odd, because while mahr is an established Islamic institution, contracts with extra stipulations are a relatively new thing. And contracts which say things like "you have to do the dishes and take out the trash" IMHO refuse to take into account that a marriage has to hit a rhythm, and takes some time to do so, and eventually you have to do whatever works. (I'm not saying anyone in this thread is like this, I've actually met people like this. these are the same people who call extended family meetings to adjure their husbands to remember to pick their socks up off the floor.)
|