You pretty much nailed it sister. I hear this sort of garbage all the time.
It's all too easy for some folks to completely overlook the social/institutional effects of slavery and the ensuing Jim Crow era. White privilege is also underplayed significantly. Nothing new here. Often these ideas also rely heavily on an exaggerated attention paid to "racial characteristics" (ignoring that race is largely a social construct).
I could go on for hours about this topic but I'm too tired right now.
Here's a great article by Tim Wise that dovetails nicely with your observations.
Tim Wise- (Proto)Typical White Denial
(I tried linking to this article from Wise's own website but it doesn't seem to work.....this will have to do)