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Originally Posted by Ilikemyscarf
no, a guy needs to know how to be a man.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iTz_NoT_Me_iTzZu
No, babying a grown man gets old real fast.
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okay, i see where you guys are coming from, but i'd like to think every situation isn't the same. if there is one partner who is generally stable, then maybe it doesnt matter whether that partner is a man or a woman, as long as they are supportive enough.
also, if this same less stable man can suck up his own issues enough to be strong for the woman in her own times of need, then is there really a problem?
Quote:
Originally Posted by vanillawafer
If he was working on his iman and was no long doing shady stuff, then yes I would. I could help him build up his self esteem inshAllah. If we both loved each other, then I think self-esteem issues isn't a big thing. I'd be more worried about where his iman is and if he's changed his ways for the better.
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i agree. somehow i feel like helping him with his personal insecurities (and the firm support he offers me in the face of my own) make me a much stronger person than i thought i was-- and it's sort of empowering. not in a feminazi kind of way
, but rather in a way that makes me feel like i'm becoming more practical, and, well..... adult.
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Originally Posted by DramaRani
As long as you're not sacrificing your well being - mental and physical, then I guess go for it. Having to constantly build up someone's self-esteem is draining.
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and THAT's why therapy exists
Quote:
Originally Posted by DramaRani
And if his iman is unstable, how can you guarantee that your trying to strengthen it and help him won't back fire?
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it's a valid question. but i think (and hope) that this is more an issue of one of those highs and lows of iman that most of us deal with than a consistent problem of low iman.
jazaks to everyone who replied
